Ruby tries to do this all the time but she’s so bad at being sneaky she always gets to excited and ruins it :~)
isnt it weird that you won’t remember this exact moment in like a month
what if i ordered pizza in the middle of the hurricane.
they yelled at me.
omg its me
This is my life, encapsulated by a talking parrot.
- Me: *minding my own business*
- Will.i.am: hit it Fergie!
- Me: ALL THE TIME I TURN AROUND BROTHER'S GATHER ROUND ALWAYS LOOKING AT ME UP AND DOWN LOOKING AT MY (UH) I JUST WANNA SAY IT NOW - I AINT TRYING TO ROUND UP DRAMA LITTLE MAMA I DONT WANNA TAKE YOUR MAN AND I KNOW IM COMING OFF JUST A LITTLE BIT CONCEITED AND I KEEP ON REPEATING HOW THE BOYS WANNA EAT IT BUT IM TRYIN TO TELL THAT I CANT BE TREATED LIKE CLIENTELE CUZ THEY SAY SHES DELICIOUS
"why are these scientists talking about pluto when they should be curing ebola" because they’re astrophysicists not molecular engineers or infectious disease specialists you’re getting mad at the wrong people
*walks into Starbucks and violently shakes the barista* LOOK WHERE THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO GET A NEW BED FRAME THEN????